I started my crew trainer book! :D

Quite exciting really! :D

Payrise and promotion here I come! :D

Why did you have to lead me on for so long?

All you have done is cause me pain after pain after pain.

I'm sick of the heartache I feel because of you.

Why me?

Hahahaha....

...yeah right. Stop trying to please me. I know you're a liar.

Times like these I wish I was still a cadet.

I miss all my mates; I miss going sailing.

It's something I love and I wish I could do again.

Pity. They don't need any staff at the unit.

Sometimes I wish I could be fucked like a slut.

It's a quarter after one, and I'm all alone and I need you now.

I said I wouldn't call, but I lost all control and I need you now.

And I don't know how I can do without, I just need you now.

I read all my previous posts on this blog.
I was pathetic. Two months on and I couldn't be happier.
We've had our rough patches and we're still together.
You make me so happy.


14 months <3

Wedding Party - Katie, Me, Mum, Dad and Andrew

I dislike this photo because it's my dad, but how happy mum looks,
and how much I look like dad now.

The only photo I have seen of myself after I was born.
In my dad's, mother's arms.

:) The little birth tag that was on the cot I was in.

Newspaper clipping - Note: Tate/Randall as mum and dad didn't get
married till I was one and a half.

My christening - (L-R) Pauline, Sonia, Ange, Me, Andrew, Mum and Dad.

I thought I commented back on your blog, but obviously I only pushed Preview.  That sucks just a bit. I'm sorry I kept your sister from you. I should learn to share. It's a bit hard sometimes when she's the only friend I have. You guys I consider my second family. You guys took me in and gave me a roof over my head. I was like a stray cat.  I'm sorry :(

"When the girl you like thinks you're gay,"

"The girl I like knows I'm gay,"

                      "She likes you too,"

I've been thinking about it a lot lately and it has really been upsetting me. I don't know where else to vent but here. I don't want to mention it to her otherwise she'll probably zone out and not listen to me 'cause all my problems revolve around sex.

Well maybe that's just it.

The biggest regret in my life is losing my virginity to, what I'm going to call, the wrong guy. I regret it so bad. There was no relationship; there was no emotion. It was just a fuck. I honestly regret it so bad.

Girls have their little fairy tales; yeah, well part of mine was to lose it to a guy I loved. To lose it in the moment. Passion. Not horniness and lust. I feel disgusting thinking about it.

Maybe that's why I want to connect with her.  I love her; want to be with her; care about her. But there is nothing when we do. No connection, no passion, no kind of love whatsoever.

 It's what I want, but because she's been screwed over and isn't really attracted to me, she doesn't want it.

I have my ideas in my head. I just wish I could be with her properly. It would mean a lot to me.

I hope you read this...